


Fix This

by rosymamacita



Series: Arcadia [9]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Comfort, F/M, Season 3, heart to heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-04-11
Packaged: 2018-06-01 13:45:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6522184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosymamacita/pseuds/rosymamacita
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>ALIE has taken over Raven. Clarke is back with the delinquents, but can Bellamy ever trust her again after abandoning them for Polis?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fix This

**Author's Note:**

> A prompt based on speculation after 3.10 and promos of 3.11

Watching Raven-not-Raven chained to the bed was awful. Her dead eyes and heartless words were nothing like the tough mechanic he knew. 

Watching Clarke lunge towards her, a feral animal, screaming epithets and tearing the bedding apart was truly terrifying.

Bellamy grabbed Clarke around the waist and dragged her off, conscious of not-Raven’s flat eyes on them. Clarke kicked and swung and Bellamy manhandled her through the door, out of Niylah’s cabin.

“Clarke!” he said, struggling against her thrashing. “Clarke!” He set her to her feet outside, grabbed her shoulders and turned her to face him. He took a deep breath. “You can’t let your anger get in the way of what we need to do.”

Clarke stood there. Panting. Bellamy grabbed her hand and half led, half dragged her into the night, far enough into the woods that he thought Monty and Jasper and Harper and all the rest of their friends couldn’t hear them, but not so far that they couldn’t get back in an emergency.

They stopped by the trunk of a large, spreading tree. She stood, her head hanging, looking away.

“Clarke,” he said. She didn’t answer. “Clarke.”

He took her by the shoulders and spun her around. Her long tangled hair hung down and covered her face. He had never seen her like this. It was like she was broken. He felt the broken pieces of his own soul, and rubbed up against them, remembering how they felt. Like probing a toothache with your tongue. Feeling the pain of loss and regret, just to remember that you could feel.

“Clarke,” He said. “Clarke. Look at me.” He lifted her chin with a gentle finger. Her eyes were hidden still behind her hair, so he brushed it back. “Are you okay?”

She looked up at him, her eyes wide and dark, full of shadows. “No, I’m not. I’ve lost her,” she said, her gaze locked with his as if he could understand, as if he could save her. “I’ve lost all of them. The ones who’ve died. The one’s who stayed behind and gave up living for this...” she raised an arm and gestured at Niylah’s cabin. “Raven, my mom,” she choked out. “All our people.”

“Not all of them, Clarke. We’re still here.”

“Haven’t I lost you, too?”

“What? No.”

“Really? Are you saying you trust me? Believe in me? Aren’t looking at me right now like I’m some crazy, ruined thing? I left you Bellamy, I left all of you and I let this happen to you.”

Bellamy laughed. It was not a happy laugh. “Listen, princess. I know everyone in Polis bowed down to Wanheda, but I think you’re overestimating your importance here. We managed to fuck up Arkadia all on our own and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t think you could take my mistakes from me and shoulder the burden in some ass backwards ‘I bear it so they don’t have to’ thing, okay?”

“But if I had stayed...”

A jolt shot through his heart at the words. He had wondered about them so many times in the last few months. He shook it off. “Who knows what would have happened if you had stayed. Maybe you would have died in Mount Weather when it blew. Maybe you’d have been forced to swallow that damn chip just like your mother. Maybe we wouldn’t have Becca’s book and that damn commander chip and a way to maybe stop ALIE.”

Now she looked shocked. “Really? You trust me after the way I abandoned you? Chose Lexa who left you to die.”

“What do you want from me? Do you want me to tell you it’s okay? I needed you and you left. It’s not okay.”

Clarke rocked back as if he has slapped her.

“What you did was wrong, Clarke. It doesn’t go away. Just like the things I did don’t go away. Lincoln is never coming back and I have to live with it.”

“If you need forgi--” she started.

“Don’t.”

“But...”

“You can’t use that word like a magic pill, Clarke. I have to make it right. I have to fix things.”

Clarke slid down against the trunk of the tree, sitting in the leaf litter. Bellamy sat next to her. “You hurt me, Clarke. I needed you and you left.” He sighed. “But I still believe in you.”

This time when she looked at him, the question was in her eyes. “Why?”

He sighed and looked off into the woods. Because she was Clarke, he thought. “Because we are partners,” he said.

He felt her shift beside him. She reached out and took his hand, pulling it into her lap. He turned to look at her in the dark of the woods.

“I won’t leave you again, Bellamy. I can’t. I need you.” 

“I know,” he said, angry at himself for the way his heart raced when she said the words. He looked off into the shadows. “You need me to help get our people out of the City of Light.”

“No!” she cried. “No.” He felt the way her hand gripped at his wrists, as if she could save him from falling. “I need you. That’s all. Just you.” He brought his other hand around to cover hers. 

He didn’t want to ask her, but he couldn’t stop himself. “Why?” He hated the throatiness of his voice. 

For a second he thought he saw her lips curve up into a smile, then she cocked her head and said, “Because we’re partners.”

He felt the laugh bubble out of him. “Okay,” he said. He felt her scoot closer to him, leaning up against his side, resting her head on his shoulder. His heart started racing. She had never done that before. They sat there for a while. He brought his arm around her shoulders and she snuggled into him. For a second everything seemed right in the world. 

A laughable illusion.

Clarke sighed. “Bellamy, ALIE is going to kill them all.”

“We’ll fix this, Clarke, the way we fix everything.”

She squeezed his fingers in hers. “Together?” she asked.

He let his breath out. “Together.”


End file.
